Sunday, July 11, 2010


Thursday, March 18, 2010

Emerald City Comicon 2010

Another successful Comicon. Matt, Cap, and I made the trip to the Emerald City Comicon and might I say this was the best one yet. It was also the Green Lanterns debut and with the help from friends I think it turned out great. Even though this is a comic convention really only about 5% dress up so those that did got their pictures taken a lot, I had mine taken at least 50 times and you know I was a bit concerned when I first showed up with the skin tight spandex and all but it soon went away and I quite enjoyed it. I had the opportunity to get my photo with both Leonard Nimoy and Stan "The Man" Lee, not wanting to get out of my costume i chose to get my pic with Stan dressed up, I did however apologize for the DC nature of my costume as he the creator of Spider Man, Iron Man, Thor and many others which are DC's rival Marvel, and he responded "oh, thats alright...well just shoot you on the way out." So I cant wait till next year when I will hopefully be flying the Red Yellow and Blue colors of the Man of Steel! Need to get Taron out here with a Batman outfit.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Punxsutawney Phail!

Once a year our hearts and minds turn to the possible light at the end of the proverbial tunnel of winter, and who do we put our trust and support to, none other but the largest rat I have ever seen. That's right, Puxsutawney Phil, the groundhog held captive by the town of Punxsutawney Pennsylvania. Now my problem is this according to historical records Phil has only correctly predicted the proper remainder of our wintry subjugation 39% of the time, I'm not sure what your schools policy is but at mine that's a failing grade, but do we care? No we continue year after year to come back and worship at the alter of a grade school dropout. Did you know that there are several other communities that have groundhogs? Staten Island Chuck, General Beauregard Lee of Georgia, who holds honorary doctorates from the University of Georgia and Georgia State in "Weather Prognostication" and "Southern Groundology", Sir Walter Wally of North Carolina. Buckeye Chuck of Ohio, and Chuckles, Connecticut's resident rodent oracle, I found 22 of these guys all over the U.S. but Phil has the best PR department I guess. I say we break the shackles of these oppressive dictators of the weather and hold our heads high, just don't breath too deeply or your nose hairs will freeze together.

By the way if you take the majority from all of the rats looks like it should be an early spring.

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Ode to desiccated bovine flesh

Oh those strips of flesh
so chewy and sweet
salty, spicy, and teriyaki

Oh who doesn't love
this ambrosia from earth
only those with very little mirth

So animal rights and environmentalist
kindly mind your own business
and leave me to my bovine bliss
I can't hear you over my dehydrator anyway.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Just keep looking straight ahead

The time has come and the blossoms are beginning to burst from their long dormancy from this unusually long and cold winter, and people are starting to peek out of their doors all pasty white and vitamin D deficient. And as tradition holds, in our long captivity from old man winter we have had a long time to look at and become sick of the large amounts of "stuff" that fills every nook, cranny, shelf, and drawer. Our capitalist nature begins to take hold and the garage/yard sales begin to sprout, like the dot coms of the 90's, it starts with just one, then you can't walk down the street without tripping over three hand made signs with convenient times locations and arrows to get you to the sure fire sale of the century.

So now you've done all the work, you have collected everything that you would like to get rid of and its all nicely tagged and placed for optimal viewing by the throngs of people that surely will come parading by your treasure laden trove. Sure enough the first seekers of fine appurtenances, come into view and begin perusing your rejected belongings. After a minute or two they give you the perfunctory smile and off they go, and then it hits you, why didn't they want any of your prized possessions? Are they too good for your "stuff"? and for the rest of the day you are watching each face as they come by, some quickly glancing through your "junk", while others just keep walking trying not to make eye contact confirming what you now know, no one wants your collection of Elvis memorabilia, tape deck from your 77 ford, or your never been used buns of steel cassette tape.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

4x4in Through the Memories

Aunt Donnell or as she preferred for a time it pronounced Dnell, has given me several interesting memories. Donnell is my moms baby sister, and she was young enough during my time in the old nest, that i remember her as a teenager. I vaguely remember her all dolled up for prom, but more importantly i remember how she was always trying to trick me! off the top of my head i recall one day we were in grandma, and grandpas bedroom and they had one of those heated blankets on the bed, and as i was laying there i felt that round electrical transformer tube thingy embedded in the blanket. being the inquisitive young lad i was, i asked the nearest "adult" what it was, of course with full sincerity she explained that it was a finger sewn in there from the factory after a terrible accident. Even though im sure i put up a resounding nuh uh, little doubts lingered in my susceptible brain for some time.

Another time she was eating those licorice bits, and as i was munchin one, she decided to let me in on a little secret that they were really bits of body parts.(I think she was a rather disturbed child).

She wasnt always on the winning side though:
In 1986(7 years old) she took me to McDonald's and got me a happy meal, and inside that joy filled box was a tiny hamburger, 3 fries, and a Stomper Mini 4X4, I can't remember which one it was exactly it was either the Chevy Van or the Toyota tercel. As it turns out this was the last one she needed to finish her collection, and she wanted it bad, she tried to bribe me with several things till she got to the cold hard cash. $5 could have been mine but no, that toy was not going to leave my greasy little hand.

My priorities have definantly changed over time, and Donnell just wondering, still up for that trade??

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Dinner Time!

Dad - Guess who's coming over for dinner!
Me - I don't know who?
Dad - you gotta guess.
Me - uh...grandma??
Dad - Nooooooo, hes really messy.
Me - Cant be Matt, he already lives here. I don't know who?
Dad - JOE!
Me - Joe?? Joe who?

Now that may not be verbatim, however I would say to my best recollection this is how EVERY night we had sloppy joes for dinner went. I believe that dads have this "ability" impressed into them at the time of their first child's birth, and by "ability" I'm not talking about the super strength, speed, and heat vision, I'm talking about the ability to find joy in the same jokes over and over and over again.

First of all My dad is a wonderful man, he stepped into a full grown, full blown family the second he said I do. There is no man on this earth that i respect and admire more than him, I'm not saying that our family is perfect, in fact, there were some who i will not name that made life rather difficult. But that is neither here nor there, and take it or leave it, i am the "man" i am today due to the gentle cattle prodding of dad. I have many fond memories of dad; riding across Wanita lake in the canoe with dad shouting out WANITA WHERE ARE YOU!, or spending time fixing the tail light on the ol minivan I happened to break while practicing driving..hey don't judge me, and might i add was totaled shortly there after by Tammy! ahh the memories.

As i was eluding to earlier, "joke" is a rather loosely applied term, for as they say, "one mans joke is another mans screwed up childhood". Anywho, i guess when your repertoire consists of mainly two jokes, you cant be held too accountable for the reuse of them on occasion, and as you have already heard the first of these, the second is thankfully a seasonal one that only makes sense during Christmas. Now most people(that celebrate Christmas) have been told to be careful and behave themselves because Santa is watching them. I had the pleasure of his [Santa] company at ALL times watching me through those beady little eyes and waxen expression. Now if you heard this story from any of my family you would be told the incorrect version, because it appears they collectively they have all caught amnesia and seem to be suffering from the same delusional dream as it were. I am here to set the record straight, I did not and have never believed this candle (which is what it was) that was constantly turned to face me during every meal, was in fact the real Santa or some sort of relay device to transmit my current goodlieness to the man himself! My family would portray that I would become disconcerted and in fact that was most defiantly the case, however it was not because i was worried about this charlatan ratting me out, but sheer despondence of having to have to go through this another year. Ahh well, I guess we cant win them all. And as I reminisce, we kids are not as innocent as we might wish or claim, cause "how do you catch a squirrel?" was the most used joke in our house, and I am happy to announce that dad has finally caught on and knows that all you have to do is climb up a tree and act like a nut!

I plan on writing a series of these about my family immediate and extended for no other reason than to give excuses as to why i have fears of commitment, gummy bears, and squirrels coming into my bed on my honeymoon.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Just go with it

Aright so, the first picture is of the mushroom that we found growing behind my work building. It is commonly known as a fly agaric or Amanita muscaria by its scientific name. It's a bit larger than my hand spread out. I began thinking, that this fungus seems familiar. Then I remembered several examples during my childhood, and it all came together! According to wikipedia it is "..famed for its hallucinogenic properties". Which makes complete sense, as during the entire series of the Smurfs there were a total of 3 female smurfs...yet the male smurfs never questioned this?! It is because they sustain a constant high as a result of living in these mushrooms. Then we move to Mario; ah Mario, such a sad life that we never even realized. although here again there were plenty of signs, if only we cared enough to take action and maybe set up an intervention or something. So what happens when he eats the mushroom? He gets LARGE, strong, and fast. Does that sound logical? and why is he always so aggressive? Paranoid even? Well here is my hypothesis; none of that ever happened! we were just a witness of what happened in his mind. I mean..hes a plumber, not the most exciting of jobs, and who wants to date a plumber? I can't imagine they come home smelling like roses. thus the motivation to escape reality and hide in a world that your best friends name is Toadstool and you are always trying to save Princess Toadstool. As I see it, hes just a casualty of his circumstances. So, if you see me in the future and my eyes are glazed over and I act a little funny...don't worry its just that the pink elephants won't leave me alone and i'm a little worn out.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Mac Daddy Mcguyver

Ol Rick gives his best. I will update soon with my time at GateCon and our family trip to Canada, land of the crazy drivers.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008


It has begun! 8 days till I embarrass my family by dragging them to another country so that I, (not them) can attend GATECON 2008! whoohoo! I suppose the only saving grace in the eyes of my little sister is that I will not be dressing up as anyone but the nerd that I am. Should be a blast for every one though, as they will get to do some sightseeing and such while I am sequestered.